Are you already sick of the phrase “New Year, New You”? I know I am! It pisses me off every single year. There is always so much pressure built up on New Year around resolutions, self-improvement and becoming a better you. Who began this silly tradition of perpetual pressure and ‘not-enough-ness’ anyway?
By starting off the New Year thinking about how you can be ‘better’, you are essentially declaring that you are not enough, or that you are broken and are in need of fixing.
Or maybe even that you are undeserving of loving yourself until you… get that promotion… lose that weight… find a partner… earn more money… the cycle is never-ending.
Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s an admirable quality to want to work on yourself, to be willing to do the deep work necessary to face your trauma and challenges.
But when we get stuck in this cycle of constantly trying to improve or better ourselves, without loving ourselves along the way, this is when it becomes toxic and unhealthy.
But what does this look like?
This looks like accepting yourself in your full glory, BEFORE that next relationship comes along, BEFORE you shed those Crimbo pounds, BEFORE you pass that test or get that qualification, and BEFORE you own a big house or flashy car.
I say let’s start loving ourselves right here, just as we are. Make this the year you decide to love yourself NOW – it’s time.
To date, there have been approximately 107 billion people to have ever lived on this planet, and still, there is, and will only ever be, one you.
Therefore, being yourself is the biggest gift you can give the Universe. YOU are your own superpower.
Don’t wait any longer to embrace it – the World needs you now!
When I first went to University, I found some statistics that said there were 40,000 students in my university town. It occurred to me that someone amongst these thousands of students would like me for me, but if I wasn’t myself, then I would end up attracting people who liked the version of me I was pretending to be, and not the real me.
This realisation has always encouraged me to try and be as authentic as possible so that I attract the most aligned people and opportunities.
One of the hardest things about being yourself is that some people are not going to like you, and this was super difficult for the people-pleaser in me.
But on a planet of 8 billion people, no matter how hard we try (I’m looking at you people pleasers!) we are never ever going to be liked by everyone, so we might as well attract people we’re going to like in return.
With this in mind, it makes far more sense to just be yourself, at least this way you are more likely to attract the people that will like you for you, and not the role you’re playing.
Being authentic is an act of self-love. It’s a Universal declaration that “I am good enough, just as I am”. It’s giving yourself permission to be yourself, whoever that may be today AND tomorrow.
It’s time to stop apologising for who you are, to stop trying to be better, and to start just being you. The Universe is a mirror, show it who you are and it will provide things in alignment with this.
But yes, some of us (myself included), would still like to work on ourselves and fulfill our potential as best as possible.
To do this in a healthy way, we must do it consciously, while loving and accepting ourselves along the way.
So, if you do consciously choose to be better, why don’t you try being better at prioritising your own needs?
Why don’t you vow to listen to your body, and to rest more, before you are forced to through injury, illness, or burnout?
Why not promise to seek out joy, play, and laughter? And commit to speaking to yourself with compassion and tenderness.
And if you consciously decide to cut things out, instead of cutting out carbs, social media and Netflix, why don’t you cut out negative self-talk, toxic relationships, and perfectionism?
Being yourself, and showing up for yourself, on a regular basis, is one of the bravest and most rewarding things you will ever do.
I now invite you to consider (or re-consider) your resolutions, intentions, and commitments for this year. Below I have provided a set of journaling prompts to support you.
Your Journal Prompts:
How can I love myself more this year?
How can I show up for myself this year?
How can I be more me this year?
Sharing is caring!
Once you have reflected on your new commitments, I would love if you could share them with us in the comments below. This can be super helpful to those who are struggling to create their own intentions and could learn from your wisdom.
p.s. If you’re ready to go deeper with your self-love journey, then check out my FREE 7-Days of Self-Love Challenge to bring self-love into your daily life in a fun and playful way #ItsASelfLoveThing
You are Not broken, but…
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